7 days a week laugh.

[Leonvdb]

[Insomnia]

[Insomnia]

.

[gordini]

A Coloured, Whitey and an Indian sit in a restaurant.
They're staring at another man sitting at his own at a table in the corner.
He looks so familiar, and not recognising him is driving them mad.
They stare and stare, until suddenly the Coloured twigs:
"My goodness that is the POPE!"
Sure enough, it is the POPE.
Thrilled, they club in and send him over the best chow on the menu.

The Pope accepts the food, smiles over at the three men, and starts eating.
After he's finished eating, the Pope approaches the trio.
He reaches for the hand of the Indian and shakes it, thanking him for the food.
When he lets go, the Indian gives a cry of amazement:
"My Goodness! The arthritis I've had for 30 yrs. is gone. It's a miracle!"

The Pope then also shakes the White's hand, thanking him.
As he lets go, the man's eyes widen in shock.
"Its true mate!, the bad back I've had all my life is completely gone. It's a miracle!"

The Pope then approaches the Coloured who knocks over a chair and a table in trying to get away from the Pope.
"What's wrong?" asks the Pope.
The Coloured shouts, "Djy rakie aan my nie, ek kry disability grant!

[Insomnia]

Drunk is as drunk does.
All I can say is WDD!

http://cdnapi.kaltura.com/index.php/ext ... 1_hpljn9lw

[gordini]

I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked me for a couple of dollars for dinner.

I took out my wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked,"If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"

"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" I asked.

"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said.."I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on hunting equipment?" I asked.

"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't gone hunting in 20 years!"

"Well," I said, "I'm not going to give you money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a shower and a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that?

I replied, "Don't worry about that. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up drinking, fishing and hunting."

[gordini]

A Scottish Jew decided to retire and take up golf, so he applied for membership at a local golf club.


About a week later he received a letter that his application has been rejected.

He went to the club to inquire as to why.

Secretary: You are aware that this is a Scottish golf club?

Scot: Aye, but I am as Scottish as you are, ma'am, my name is MacTavish.

Secretary: Do you know that on formal occasions we wear a kilt?

Scot: Aye, I do know, and I wear a kilt too.

Secretary: You are also aware, that we wear nothing under the kilt?

Scot: Aye, and neither do I.

Secretary: Are you also aware, that the members sit naked in the steam room?

Scot: Aye, I also do the same.

Secretary: But you are a Jew?

Scot: Aye, I be that.

Secretary: So, being Jewish, you are circumcised, is that correct?

Scot: Aye, I be that, too.

Secretary: I am terribly sorry, but the members just would not feel comfortable sitting in the steam room with you,
since your privates are different from theirs.

Scot: Ach, I know that you have to be a Protestant to march with the Orangemen.
And I know that you have to be a Catholic to join the Knights of Columbus .
But this is the first time I've heard that you have to be a complete prick to join a golf club!

[Insomnia]

Hai,hai, Tokoloshe.

http://dailysun.mobi/news/read/4204/tok ... -ten-years

[pas-chill]

Hai,hai, Tokoloshe.

http://dailysun.mobi/news/read/4204/tok ... -ten-years

That's not a tokoloshe. That's sounds like Sanral in action.

[Insomnia]

Iron Mike knock out.
Kapow!

http://thechive.com/2014/01/21/thatll-b ... /buffout3/