Friday funny

[Orange]

Q. What are steroids
A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs

Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty
A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery (So true)

Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
A. Premature death

Q. What does 'varicose' mean?
A. Nearby

Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
A. The caesarean section is a district in Rome

Q. What is a seizure?
A. A Roman Emperor. (Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)

Q. What is a terminal illness
A. When you are sick at the airport. (Irrefutable)

Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?
A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight

[Insomnia]

OPPA GUPTA-STYLE

[73Ranchero]

LEOPARD SWALLOWS WOMAN WHOLE !!!!

[68barracuda]

my eyyyyeeeessssssssss -that which have been seen cannot be unseen

[Insomnia]

[Insomnia]

Hier's ek my BOK!!!

[gordini]

Housework was a woman's job, but one evening, Janice arrived home from work to find the children bathed, one load of laundry in the washer and another in the dryer. Dinner was on the stove, and the table set. She was astonished!

It turns out that Dave had read an article that said, 'Wives who work full-time and had to do their own housework were too tired to have sex'.

The night went very well. The next day, Janice told her friends all about it. 'We had a great dinner. Dave even cleaned up the kitchen. He helped the kids do their homework, folded all the laundry and put it away. I really enjoyed the evening.'

'But what about afterward?' asked her friends.

'Oh, that........... Dave was too tired.'

[gordini]

Fair Australian......

"G'day mate, Aussie Helpline...What's the problem cobber?"

"I'm in Darwin with my sheila and she's been stung on the minge by a wasp,
and now her tingeling has completely closed up."

"Bummer mate!"

"Thanks mate, I hadn't thought of that. Bye."

[gordini]

Two turtles go camping and pack a cooler box with sandwiches and beer.

After three days of walking, they arrive at a great spot but realize they've forgotten a bottle opener.

The first turtle turns to the second and says, "You've gotta go back and get the opener or else we have no beer."
...
"No way," says the second. "By the time I get back, you will have eaten all the food."

"I promise I won't," says the turtle. "Just hurry!"



Nine full days pass and there's still no sign of the second turtle.

Exasperated and starving, the first turtle takes his first bite from the sandwiches.

Suddenly, the second turtle pops out from behind a rock and yells,

"I knew it! I'm not f#cking going!"

[RASSIE]

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